Athletic background: Jiu Jitsu black belt under Rubens “Cobrinha” Maciel, 3 years of dutch kickboxing under Antoni Hardonk.

Education: Master of Science in Sport and Performance Psychology with concentration in applied practice from the University of Western States. Bachelor's degree in English with an emphasis on Creative Writing from California State University, Northridge. 

MY STORY

I started training jiu jitsu in 2009 while I was working and in college full-time. It was the first decision I made that was completely my own and it altered the direction of my life path.

I competed for the first time after three months of training and maintained an active career since for over a decade. I have experience competing in many organizations and competitions all over the world. See my resume below for major accomplishments.

A pivotal moment in my career was when I created a non-profit with my mom and sister called #SubmitTheStigma after the suicide of my father. My own experiences with mental health and the unfortunately common tragedy my family endured sparked an opportunity to help others feel less alone. I organize charity seminars all over the world to educate people and call for action to support and accept one another within the jiu jitsu community. You can find patches and shirts at most major tournaments sported by those who support the cause.

I received my black belt from the hands of Cobrinha in November 2017 and chose to pursue a career in MMA. I won my amateur debut and when the pandemic happened in 2020, I took time off to consider my long-term goals of building a legacy. I attended UWS in 2021 to become a mental performance consultant and am proud to help others develop their potential with a healthy, sustainable approach that champions well-being, enjoyment, and optimal performance outcomes.

My Consulting Philosophy

I have always marched to the beat of my own drum. Whether it was choosing my own mismatched outfits in preschool or choosing to dedicate my 20’s to a niche sport, I have always felt the need to follow my passions no matter how much they differed from the status quo. This was by no means an easy task considering the desire to belong is a basic psychological need (Ryan & Deci, 2000). I constantly grappled with my need to be different while wanting to be the same because blending in is much easier than standing out. When I began my athletic experience at the age of 20, I had not seen myself as an athlete or a performer but what I learned on the mats gave me the confidence to seek greatness through authentic means.

I believe greatness comes from authenticity. This is not to say that being alike is a sure way to avoid greatness, but standing out is key. What makes someone great at what they do? They strive for excellence. In order to strive for excellence, you must determine what it is about you and your story that stands out as above good, above average, or above expectation. These can be labeled your gifts or your superpowers or your talents. Whatever they are, you must find them, nurture them, and enjoy them. The key to greatness, then, is liking what you’re good at. When both of those align, greatness becomes easy.

I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 21 while I was knee deep in my undergraduate program. My mom had been advised by my school to have me tested when I was in kindergarten, however my pediatrician reassured her that I was “just smart”. This led me to many gifted and honors classes throughout my primary education and report cards that revealed okay grades and comments like “talks too much”. A diagnosis is not always beneficial but for me it was an opportunity to relinquish myself from the struggles I faced trying to fit into a world that does not operate the way I do. This led me to live a life that pertained to my individual values rather than the traditional values of society. My endeavor to conquer a male-dominated sport while putting other traditional values aside like motherhood and career is an authentic expression of my pursuit of excellence and greatness.

Performance is an opportunity for growth, value clarification, and expression. In this way, mistakes and failure are not setbacks but data to perform better next time. Determining individual values outside of the status quo helps to create a path of authenticity in the face of adversity–the pull to conform. Expression is essential for making one’s own thoughts and feelings known. What makes all of this possible is an emphasis on task over ego orientation (Duda, 1989). If we focus on comparison to others, we limit ourselves. If we instead focus on becoming better than we were, there is no comparison and therefore no limit to what we can achieve. Greatness is showing up to a challenge with our authentic selves, the way we know best and in the best way we can. Thus a mastery orientation allows us to strive for greatness outside of the confines of the status quo and forge the path of least internal resistance while having the courage to face external adversity.

I experienced many instances of external adversity, or things beyond my control during my athletic career such as lack of funds, gender inequality, rejection, injury, and bad calls. Understanding what I had control over and what I did not helped to mitigate my feelings of helplessness. Rather than becoming a product of my circumstances, I chose to focus on my internal locus of control because it gave way for more certain expectations (Rotter, 1966). If I could regulate my emotions and arousal, it would be easier to realize my game plan and access knowledge I gained during preparation for competitions. There are many things athletes cannot control so understanding which is external and which is internal can promote more adaptability in facing adversity.

Another aspect of facing adversity was failure in achieving a goal. It can be easy to criticize ourselves when we fail to live up to expectations whether they be our own or others’ expectations of us. This is why self-compassion is important for achieving greatness. Liking yourself and embracing your authenticity undermines the shame we feel when we do not measure up (Brown, 2015). Pressure to perform can lead to self-criticism and a tough love approach that only serves to reinforce shame and external expectations. Self-compassion consists of mindfulness about our insecurities to raise awareness, self-kindness to comfort ourselves in the midst of struggle, and common humanity to normalize the struggle (Neff, 2003). Achieving greatness requires struggle, but waging a war on ourselves is counterintuitive. Authenticity, then, is a way to accept ourselves and embrace our differences.

Greatness comes from within. Who we are is more important than what we achieve (Brown, 2015). I march to the beat of my own drum because I am wired differently. I embrace those differences because I know that fighting them in order to conform leads to discomfort and self-loathing. So I choose to root for myself and whether or not I achieve greatness is interpreted by me.

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